Back Behind The Lens

Got a new camera on tuesday. Not having a good camera does not feel right somehow! Yesterday on sunday I did some pics. There was half a plan to do some today but that didnot happen, thats OKish.
I took it slow and was realistic, will not go into the technical details of the shoot just to say I got a very workable solution producing perfectly acceptable pics. Not totally there yet but promising shall we say.
Did a bodystocking set. I used to be 11 st 4 in my heyday but am not 12 st 10 ish. I am prepared to allow a certain amount of special pleading regarding muscle mass but even so the body looks larger. The abdomen especially. It is accepted that there is weight to lose but the pics could be better. The legs once my pride and glory are more muscular the thighs bigger.
A certain amount of special pleading is required here. The body still looks pretty good all things considered and the pics are not embarassing by any means. There is not the sense that I should be packing it in at all. Used Kryolan stick which is better for pics. Certainly the red lipstick helped as did the red wig. The too opaque stockings were not a success and will not be repeated. There was no zing moment but I do feel the benefit and putting on the makeup went well, that can be a bad time.
The corset, well, its always a battle tightening up solo and so it was again. The bottom once looked quite pert, no longer but again still not too bad. The sense is that more pilates is required.
There should be enough for say 4 or fresh new pics to go up, possibly something for Xhamster too.
Once when J and K went to the cinema I would just go for it. Makeup on pics ahoy! You could pretty well just put the flash on the bannister, frame up the camera and go, firing away. It all worked. The sony alpha 58 well it never was good really but I perservered and did find workarounds but it would be wrong to say I was ever really comfortable with it. I knew it needed changing but was worried about buying another dog and the thyroid did its thing and well whatever happened happened.
Hopefully there will be more pics now.

Christmas Card 2019

Today I did the annual Xmas card. As ever it was not straight forward. There was the window cleaners who normally come on a monday so several minutes hiding from them. The intervalometer died and that pretty well ended to session, it never really came together. However did do it and thats the main thing. Used Kryolan stick which worked not bad at all. Need to get a new camera and possibly flash as the pics were acceptable but not anything more than that. The Nikon has been in my sights for some time and may well drop money on it.
The gurl had been pinging for several days so it was nice to actually give her some time. Hopefuly once back from Guildford she can be given the keys to the car a bit more.
Ideally she would be there on New Years Eve but thats unlikely again sadly. Lots of stuff ther so lets pass on.
Sadly there was not a summer holiday this year so that was not good.

Problems With Pics

Partly due to one of the cats being ill it was not possible to do the Halloween shoot on 2 Saturdays. However last Monday I did actually get done as much as it was reasonable to do. It was helped by having everything in bags already so it very much just needed to be dragged out and done. From about 9 am to 11 ish with interludes between to wash merino and other things I got ready and put on makeup for the first time in some time. By 12 I was in front of the camera and by 1.45 there were 180 pics in the full SD card. As ever it was a right battle and psychologically draining but very glad to get pics sorted. There was a plan to use the fake blood but this did not happen but that's OK ish.
I suspect now its the fear, sort of, being caught which makes it so difficult, well that set anyway.
For the next pics hopefully I can just use the flash as I used to, this shot had 2 lights as well and a complicated set with a certain amount of dressing.
Must make a real effort to dress and put up pics, so far there has been rather a lot of recycling. There are psychological questions to be asked too. I still deep down feel trans but and not dressing nearly so much.
Flickr were taken over by SmugMug not so long ago and so it was probably only a matter of time before they pulled a fast one. As of January 2019 a free account will olny be allowed 1,000 pics. I have 1,700. I will have  to upgrade to Pro. Probably not a lot of money but even so. We shall see what finally does happen. For a lot of Ts/TG the Internet is vitally important, possibly you can include me I that statement.

Its a bit of a warning too. There is over 8 years pics there and it has been a big emotional investment over that time. Probably will pony up the money, last time went pro they immediately set me to unsafe which rather put me off. I have worried about losing the blogs too and really need to sort out more backups. This blog has been important to me and I would not like to lose it. Been thtough a lot of dear diary moments with it. Accept that things move on eventually but well its caused me to have a bit of a rethink.

Fright Night

I have a plan for the Halloween photoset and today made a start, granted half hearted, on finding things. Bought a £20 sort of corset with a bit of lace but it was too short, shame. However the lace cape and veil shows promise.  Even found the red shoes I would like to use. Got a Gothic choker and gloves in the post, well somewhere in the post, and hopefully they will make a difference.  The problem was did not put any makeup on and one holdup wouldn't so it was never going to look good. Sadly the abdomen looked too big somehow. Sot of knew this, 12 st 7 lb after all but the not good enough corset/dress seemed to accentuate it somehow. Still I will go back and tidy up the chaos and possibly create some fresh mess as well.
Having said that I did feel the benefit of even a slight dip into the world of the girl. Found the white, well  not any more, what would you call it, well a bustier which I got in the first visit to Lacies. It is probably fair to say that I have never got so much enjoyment from dressing as I did those initial times.
I shall be able to hit he gym again and will be trying to do some runs so hopefully that will help in getting the body into a better shape. Got to keep a sense of perspective, its not too bad and  have not let myself go too badly. It would be very nice to get to 11 st say 7 but as it is dipping under 12 st would be good. Also I prefer to believe that I am more muscular now and that is reflected in my weight, there is probably a fair degree of truth in that too.
Lets blame the thyroid for everything, from being not ideally shaped, to the lack of desire to dress to only going out once dressed when on holiday. Actually there food poisoning is also implicated to be honest. Had a drink at Legends, white wine spritzer, if only I had brought my reading glasses. It was a very easy day and no problems.
Almost forgot, had a 2 hour session at The Boudoir; pics, pics, pics;

Still Here

I am still here and not really so sure why have not posted for such a long time. The Spring holiday was the marathon and the gurl was not part of that. I suspect also the thyroid has been naughty too. There has been dressing and even some new pics but what comes back so strongly is how much work it is, all the items are packed away and its a bit of a battle to get them. Also it is so very mentally traumatic getting dressed and then not being dressed.
Lets be fair the gurl has also been unlucky too. The 2 hours at Jodi's was blighted by the food poisoning, I felt tired and off. That was so naughty. Two bags of gurl did go down to Brighton but it hardly happened. The heat was very oppressive and in a wig would have been vile. The walk was in male mode but it was cur down anyway. There was a gurl day and very nice it was too, it was easy and just got on with it. White wine spritzer in Legends, pic in museum, cannot complain. Even the sense of a couple of wow moments, hip wiggle.

Yes well, feel a bit cheated about summer 2018.

2017, not a great year but some highlights.

2017 was not a good year for the gurl in several ways.  Lets blame the thyroid basically. Not a lot of dressing, not a lot of pics and she has been quiet all round. The weight has decreased from 12 st 9 to just under 12 st which helps. The Easter holiday was a complete success, meeting S and M the pics which went very well on Flickr and later published. That was a success. Summer 2017 was a bit strange.  For a while it was almost as if she was not going! She did and the time in London was good, Brighton the hotel was fab, less days has to be said, but did walk, got pics and recharged the batteries. Did not do clare project or meet anyone but there you go. Autumn holiday Manchester, l;ot of walking it has to be said, felt tired and the gurl very nearly didnot go. Done Manchester so can move on on that front. Nice to do Preston dressed but again can move on. Liverpool might have more to offer but Leeds feels about right.
Was dressed on New Years Eve, meal and drink, bed early in nightie but still that was good.
The Hallowean pics were different and interesting. could do with a new camera it has to be said.
Hopefully next year the thyroid will be sorted and there will be more gurl. no real advances or anything but an increased concern the face looks older which is not helping at all. Lets see what happens I suppose but nothing leaps to mind.

Microdermal Lost

For reasons not totally explained it is now December the 26th and this is my first post. On the plus side did get a Christmas card sent out, not ideal had hoped to get something more original but it will do. Also probably will get New Years Eve to myself too, absolute result.
The right microdermal has looked off for a few days, the head was at an  angle and the skin undernearh reddened.  I assumed it was merely an infection but this afternoon in the bathroom took another look.  The tip of the bracket could be almst seen and it was apparent it was unseated. I had been toying with getting them reoved anyway so pulled and it came out partly.  It took 5 minutes gentle moving and masaging for a final pull which was not painful at all to remove the microdermal bracket in totality. Very very little blood and glad its gone. Not so sure about the other two but still feel better.
Had the microdermals for over 5 years, lets say 7 that feels right. They had run their course I suppose several years ago, they had been exciting and unusual but never really lived up to their potential.  They were a gap between the nipple piercings and the scrotum piercings before the P.A. All in all they had a good innings so cannot complain.

Used to have a La senza day where i would wear new lingerie bought as a Xmas present to the gurl.  At the time not confident enough to do this when not Xmas.  The black cardboard box, the pink pouch of nicely smelling crystals, it was very nice. It ad a god vibe and really was something to look forward to. Moved on and thats not so much of a big thing any more but really need more dressing. Should get time this holiday.

Manchester, bit of a result.

OK then back from Manchester. first post for too long which probably says something. There was briefly an idea to do manchester en drab with no dressing. It was an idea which had some merit and was not followed up. I did cut back and only took 1 set of clothes really for going out in the day. There was a day in Manchester and a half day in Preston and a half day in Manchester dressed. No big wow moment but what which second small bag and the boots and insoles there was limited issues which most definately helped. Thr feet and knees stayed fine, the eyes not too much of an issue and even the wig went well. A last minute email to S about a possible meet didnot happen but it was not really ever high up on the radar anyway. Too much walking and getting lost. Need really need to get a new coat and some new tops, definately. The problem, and not for the first time, is that when it all works you think it might be possible to go further.
Three, four years ago I had a support group, was taking hormones and there was a sense that  there was a further place to go which was possible without "coming out" as they say. Perhaps there is but only recently has more dressing been possible, more pics and possibly the thyroid getting better though it is still off. There is no 5 year plan at all. There is a sense that this is as good as it is going to get.
Though it all went well there was an increasing sense that I do not look young and have to accept that and move on. Never going to pass and accept that and seem to have ground to a halt with the voice. Do need more and possibly a few occasions amonth todress and say 2 short holidays and a long holiday may be enough. We all want to look like a young girl but middle aged? Well thats the question.

Save For Tomorrow

First off, did a photosession yesterday.  It was the real proper experience, light boxes, garage, set up a set the whole enchalida. It startd going silly when the intervalometer played up rather a lot and that became an issue. It was the Madeline Smith/halloween picsso glad to get them done. With a bit of luck should also get a chance to do anothe rmore obviously jokey set later in the month. I suspected the laptop was filling up on the C drive but thought it reasonable to assume that isues would not appear with over 6 Gb of  space still free. Sadly it this I was wrong. The hard drive was whirring away a lot but ignored it until realised the issue.
Ended up dumping a lot of pics onto the external hard drive and freed up quite a lot of space.  Half way through the laptop and the external hard drive stoped talking to each other. It required a reboot and  10 mins for them to reconnect. For a brief period I did worry that I had managed to trash the equivalent of the FAT table on the external hard drive. That set me thinking about how much I actually needed and how much I could lose. Granted thats a silly question as you do not know what will become useful in the future and also you should be able to just dump it all onto the backup. My backup is an external hard drive but only 1 and thats not really good enough as todays brief scare showed. I have 2 old NAS boxes but need to spend real money on HDD to get them really working properly. At the very least I need another external hard drive.
Going back to the question regarding how much will be useful in the future? To be honest very few pics hav ebeen useful so far, there is anaawful lot of redundancy. Be sorry to lose some of the A D pics, the holiday pics too and some of my own work. The JL pics from the first session have sadly disappeared apart from a few important ones, which is depressing. I have an image of a future me looking at these pics for, sadly, i am on a downward spiral. If i were say 30 today i could expect a good 15-20 years before age would start to whither me. Ideally I could grow my own hair long and it would be a lovely auburn. OK too much thinking that way is just depressing but I am managing decline. slowing down the slowing down. Not going to get all Bladerunner "tears in the rain" but each time i look a a new set of pics i do wonder. It goes, of course it does, but there is a sense that one day it will not be enough to be thin and have good legs! There is a gg as they say on Flickr who once was clearly  a beauty and was happy to show it but today still likes the attention but the pics have spent perhaps too long in photoshop. That is not a place i would like to be. Of course we all believe that point is far away. Lets be positive I am still catching up for lost time.

Well that was progress

Just looked at the Flickr stream and saw the pic of me sunbathing on Hove shingle. Suppose there are so many things which just happen when on holiday but only now looked at the pic and thought wow. There I am in a one piece swim suit sunbathing on a towel showing a lot of skin just like a proper girl. More than that i had worn a sundress with a scoop back and cut to show alot of leg and walked there and just taken the dress off, in a ladylike way and lay there. showed legs and feet. Plam A was to wear a bikini but let down by the tucking, as it was did not stand up much as the tucking was still not ideal bit even so its a big thing really, granted the wig was a bit off and perhaps the makeup a bit tired and the flats should have been flipflops but all in all an absolute result. got to say did not look too bad, well from a distance.
There was half a plan a aspitation to do the same last year but even with the fun of changing into it underneath in a local pub did not find a suitable area ws comfortable to do it. however did this year.

Heavy Metal Again

Last night managed to put the 6 mm PA piercing in. The white area was looking quite small so decided it was worth a go. Still took say 20 mins and a bit of work but not as much as the 5 mm and there was no blood. So thats been done and its all good, odd twinge but thats to be expected. The aim is to go to 7 mm then see where we are. Put the 5 mm in March so really doing rather well. 6 mm does look like a proper size, happy with it. The issue is above 7 mm the hole requires surgery to heal, or so I have read. On the Internet so must be true.
Slight concern the piercings make tuckingharder. Have not dressed for quite soe time, possibly even 2 months, gulp. There was a possibility of today but that didnot happen, another window of opportuity should hopefully arise soon, ideally duing the half term holidays so I can borrow some props for some pics.                    Laptop being silly so will stop now.

In The Right Direction

Weighed myself this mornong, 11st 12 3/4.  Yesterday it was a pond more. This seems to hav ebeen my default weight for some time now. I am sot of in dieting mode, been cutting down but not the drink, started running again and so was hoping weight was going down. Sadly it has not. THe body looks reasonable so thats something.
The face has a slight jowly look to it. The hope was that as I reached target weight that would go, however now I do not expect that to happen, it has probaby been 3 years since below 11stone 7 lb  at the very least so not overly optomistic about what the face looks like when get there again.
Having said all that more of the weight is probably due to muscles so do not need to lose as much weight. The love handles are much smaller bt sort of still there, its al getting there.
The problem is this is the very hard bit. Last time it took so much effort to go from 12 st to 11 and a half, a lot of time, pilates and dieting.  All in all its getting better, slowly.

Hotel California

A Tgirl I have a lot of respect for has posted on Flickr that she has stopped and finished her dressing days. A lot of other girls, me included, have said best of luck for the future but one wrote"It aint over, I wish you the best of luck but..." The problem is I think she is actually correct and the girl cannot stop dressing. On another website a girl who has a lot of experience wrote that the only thing that was sure was once a  Tgirl allways a Tgirl.
Obviously we cannot know but deep down it feels as if the girl is just there now. I am not dressing much and the cold weather tends to put a dampner on it as well but I do not feel I could ever stop for good. Currently my arguement is that I was without the girl for so long and i never got romantically attached so its hardly likely to happen now which I am not sure is a good or a bad thing really. OK I do, its a bad thing.

Post Holiday Blues

The girl has started to ping again. Feel the need to dress, not a big surprise but after Summer 2017 it might have been nice if it had taken longer to resurface. During the holiday there was a day where Ididnot dress as they footfelt bad, it was a quick out of the door, no putting on makeup and clothes etc. If I were to go say fuller time I would have to factor in makeup as I could not go out without some makeup. The not doing laser sometimes begins to bite and it would have been good, certainly a close shave helps. Started epilating again and the smooth skin for longer certainly helps. I am probably 12 st going up and down a bit. Need to get back to losing weight mode, the running is kicking in and that will help. As will doing pilates again. Do not look too bad, lost at least half a stone, but more to go.
The next holiday is in  6 weeks time but may go sightly after duringterm time. Manchester or Leeds probably, not done Leeds but heard good things about it.
There was no real celebration of 10 years of the girl, nor any epiphany either, just moving on in a slow way. Lets blame the foot.Has to be said if still going after 10 yeasr then its here for good. There has been no major advance for a couple of years, partly due to the thyroid and home events but mainly due to the fact that all the easy stuff has been done. The hormone time was valuable but it was probably wise to stop when i did, granted hardly started but mentally it was quite strong.
During the holiay there was no real time to stop and consider where I am and how I had got there. OK there was but I didnot was too busy doing it I suppose. It is probably the case that there will not be significant change until significant change in my circumstances. There is a stronger chance than for 2 years that i can spend New Years Eve as the girl which would be good. Got a couple of links to ebay sites for a possible belly dancer burlesue costume which may come to fruitation.

Probably Better Than Expected

It is sunday afternoon and I am recovering from an optical migraine, it is over a week ago since I returned from the holiday, so how was it for you? Lets start with London. Two days inthe capital, tubes, museums, shops. The feet got trashed as did a couple of the toes, I was not used to walking such distances, a sorbathane sole would have helped, that long walk down the road to the room, the longer walk around after having found Stompie. Did museums, talked to people, not bad at all really. Brighton; well too much walking, bad toesa nd feet, only got better shoes too late. Still better than not having a holiday. No proper walk so not in the church, a compromise was reached which got some decent pics so thats OK.  There is the sauna, well a success, ideally would have enemed but time was not on my side. Possibly I do look old, prefer to believe the body is good and seeing others it is bu the face and hair are old, still hit all the targets there, a bit more intimacy would have been nice but did well. The Terence Higgins HIV test, syphilis and big bag of lube abd condoms was reasuring but ended up feeling a bit of a fraud, better safe than sorry and will investigate PrePip for next holiday, good to now clear. Spur of the moment thing but worth it. The weather didnot really help but the sundress was a definite success, the freedom and sense of airiness, just remember sunbloc next time. The beach in a swin suit, good, tucking not ideal would have preferred a bikini but that just didnot work. There is a sense that need to spend a bit longer initially and again into the day out on checking the presentation, relying too much on the "indness of strangers." The weight was better than it might have been but could have been better, but again it was the best I could do. There were definite "in the zone" moments quite a few to be fair but the foot let it down. The museum of Transology was a good moment too. Would like some new clothes, the sundress will become a staple, the new small crossover bag was a result too. White wine spritzer at Legends went fine too. It would have been nice to meet other gurls but understandably that didnot happen. Shame no cooridor pics but thats a small thing. Basically I was not physically fit enough for a long day and had to cut my cloth accordingly. An awful  lot did work and there is no real sense that much was missed, possibly Ghostwalk and pavilion. Ultimately there was only 5 days and I needed a rest at about 4 ish.  Thats OK. Brighton as ever went better than expected but probably not next year, well if the Pavilion is a possibility well possibly.

Is It Me Your Looking For?

It is monday and I started my packing. I realised one reason why it was so difficult was the weight if expectation of the holiday. If i packed the wrong thing would i regeret it and would the holiday be wiped out by it.  Nonsense of course but there we are. I am going to big citioes anything i really need i can buy there.  Once my razor failed the screwthread competely went, i got a new, accpetable razor in half an hour so there is really not much to worry about. On wednesday I will take another look and discard stuff and do a trip to the town and buy things to help the holiday.  The trip down will require M and S G and T, Lush soap and shampoo bars, protein bars. Today i bought studiofix MAC foundation, surprised it was £23. There was probably enough in the bottle to last but not taking that risk. The local Debenhams has a MAC counter which rather spoilt the image.  It should be perfectly made up ladies in black with a bag of expensive MAC brushes strapped round them. Instead the bag looking back reminded me of an old bus conductors leather bag for change. Then again they were probably hoping for not the local chavs or sad lloking 50 plus men saying do you have this as i held out the offending empty bottle. Else where I would have been en femme and saying Look i am a subset of your target audience. Not the Newcastle franchise granted but else where. So say Brighton all those foreign elegent rich young girls could see me and think that is part of the exotica of Brighton, what a good story it will make for my friends.
Interestingly i was walking out looking at the MAC box and making sure it was the right NW number and a rather attractive woman with a pixie cut stopped me and said "is it me you are loking for? It is micheal?" she continued at my puzzled expression. I said no and hopefully looked polite and not slightly in a way to embarass her.  These things do no hapen to me. Granted deep down I know that these events are nothing but trivia but even so you wonder. Who is Michael? I had a sort of idea she saw me coming away from MAC holding a MAC box and she was a MAC employee about to go on to shift. Or some closet Tgirl waiting to meet an off duty MAC person. I shall never know but deep down know the answer is going to be very prosaic. For me life does not work like that.
In Brighton twice I have been in Legends and unexpected things have happened. Sadly too many times it has not. Thats the problem.I have written before about the girl walking up South over street with the clumping boots. Its the potential, there is a sense that it just might, it just might. Its 2017 and too amny times it just didnot. I accept  I have to make it happen in some way, add the energy of activation to the catalyst. Its not going to happen at my home town but it might in Brighton. How many times do you have to be disappointed to say lets move on, and not just for trans reasons?

Looking Back, Looking Forward

From 2000 to 2007 the Brighton holiday was quite fun, the original first years very much so, it has to be said that by 2005 it was because to an extent of its cheapness. There would be a few days with Mr G, a walk with Mr G and a few walks by myself. It hung together but there was  a creeping sense that it was no longer enough. Then in 2007 we had a paradigm shift, it could have happened at least a year earlier possibly 2. It is difficult to over estimate the enjoyment I got dressing in my room, putting on makeup and having a meal and getting quietly drunk, listening to music. It was as good as I was going to get, a trip to Lacies or possibly Doreens for new clothes, A trip up to London for a dressing appointment, glorious.  The time in the old Boudoir with the white bricked walls, the arched window, listening to the radio for the time. Four hours of something would not get elsewhere. Granted I wanted to explore other aspects of dressing and perhaps   ImageWorks would have been better earlier but lets not spoil things. Transister was the big moonshot in 2009 with the wonderful Clare Project visit. In 2011 walked home from Clare Project dressed, though had been out dressed before a couple of times but briefly.  also there was a MAC makeover and the meeting with Rebecca. November 2011 there was going out dressed in daylight from Legends.By 2012 there wasall day dressing for several days without issue. these dates have ben taken from a docuement labelled Paige's Progress and crossreferenced with Flickr so its probably canonical.
This has ignored the 2 visits to the Brighton dressing service by the church, quick in and outs, Tranny parties,  time at Legends and meeting Stella and thats just of the top of my head.  the overiding sense is of having moved on and that i can dress and go out in a lot ofplaces now, I no longer require the liberality of Brighton. So I will be down on a sunday, foind somewhere to stash big pack, monday, tuesday wednesday in Brighton, thursday walk and friday last day.  Up on saturday. Also 2 days in London; friday and saturday. Need to plan what to do., which is a nice place to be really.

Delayed Gratification

Went outdoors today, as far as the bottom of chester road and back. passed a fish and chip shop, really wanted a bag of chips but was disciplined. Not easy though! How many times do you have to do that to get to a target weight and stay there? How many treats or small delights forgone? Well as I am not very active at the moment it all helps but in general to get the weight off its a lot of work. I have lost at least 9 lbs possibly more, its easy fat which would probably have gone anyway as the metabolism kicked in again but even so. Also been doing some pilates every day, prefer to believe you can see the difference. Again that requires some discipline as well but its worth it.
Mind you not got very far with the voice. There was a hope could pull out a female voice but no lnger ertain unless I went full time it could happen.

Nearly At The Holiday

Several days ago I spent £85 at the Sweaty Betty website.  I had been watcching the sale for a couple of weeks and for whatever reason I pounced. There was a lot of hmming and harring about size, I have a pair of large leggings and they are slightly too large so went for medium. The zero gravity running leggings are compression and that meant when I tried them onthe were very compressive. However hopefully a wash  and time will resolve that. To be honest its £85 which ould go on something else, almost 2 hours at the Boudoir, for example. Not entirely sure why
#i cracked, its a strange one. To an extent its dressing by proxy and also its a different lifestyle which the girl should have, a Fat Face, SweatyBetty white wine at Brown's she deserves. There will be 2 days at London and 4 days at Brighton, assuming I do the walk which I probably will. So finally do the Dome the ghost walk, Lewes, coffee houses, the museum, the Lanes. All of a sudden slightly pushed to fill the time. Possible MAC makeover, err, possibly.This assumes no walk with Mr G which is a possibility. Like to try Browns, oysters. In a sense it is still enough just to be the girl. Not been a good year for her so far all things considered.
The big thing is the 10 years anniversary. Need to think about doing something for that. No longer get the thrill I got going to Doreen's or Lacies. Moved on I suppose. The foot should be up to it but no running I suspect. did Doreens twice, it worked at the time but we move on. No moonshot this time, London has been done, Liverpool has been done.
The weight is under 12 stone, which is good. Been doing the pilates and its helping definately.

Result

Lets have a bit of good news.  On 2 conseuetive days my weight has been 11 st 12 lb. Result not quite sure how that happened as not been moving much in the last couple of days but lets be positive.  Since middle of May when i was 12 st  lb I have lost 11 lb in old money. Been tottering about the 12 st mark for some time so glad to go through it. Granted the weight was artifically high with the underactive thyroid but even so I feel thinner and the muscles more obvious.
The love handles are still there but they are smaller when i muffin top shall we say. The aim is to get to well as low as possible, that probably means 11 st less than 7 lb.  Thats another 5 lb at the least. lif you accept that i have more muscle now it may not so much after all for me to look better.The cheekbones are reapppearing and the chin slightly less Mr Punch.
Once the foot says yes will have to do exercise for real to get the abs sorted.  It may be too late as there is only just over 3 weeks for that to happen.
Looked at wigs on the Internet, really want an auburn one, probably a bob. Really need to give the new one a fair run but something cheap and cheerful would be nice