Quick In and Out

Managed a quick bitof dressing, no makeup or contact lenses but even so. The plan was to see how the nurses stuff looked with a possible set of pics tomorrow Yes well. That actually went surprisingly well and had a play with the Honour bodysuit Makeup does make such a difference and stopped too early but even so it did seem to make me feel better Whether tomorrow happens remains to be seen. There is stuff in bags and boxes allaround so getting a look together is a bit of a battle and tires you out There you have it really.  If I had a boudoir, makeup mirror, walk in wardrobe it would be so easy and calm, also if just left to myself it would reduce so much grief and stress.
In a hotel roo it is the bahroom, water on the floor, noise from fluorescent lights, not ideal smells, possibly not a good mirror too. Then tiding up before the hote staff come in it s a miracle I ever get out at all!
Going to get contact lens checkup today. If not for the gurl would not have used them but there we are. Suppose that is a good thing. The burlesque dancedid not happen sadly, £15 on a feather boa hopefully useful for later.When I started I looked surprisingly young, not really so much now sadly.  I have put weight on, definitely can pinch an inch at the sides, need to get rid of it Am doing more running again so that should help.

Nothing Really To Report

It is nearly the end of May and there has been no dressing of note for some time. It is very psychologically stressful to dress at home, not quite sure when that started but it is. There are also very clear psychological benefits so it is a good thing to do. I am beginning to suspect that the Support Group just being dressed was of more value than I realised at the time.
There was a vague nebulous idea of spending a few days away, even dressing away, this now seems unlikely.
When I get back to work goingtohave to sort out holidays. Then can book a holiday away. Yes probably Brighton.

Well That Was Not Bad At All

Managed to finally do some pics and actually dress. The makeup went on quite quickly and easily, managed to find most of the clothes I was looking for and stopped at a time whick felt right. So all in all it went as well as can be expected. A first look at the pics and enough were OK. Need to really dress more it does calm me down. Been a few twinges with women wearing flats. If I had the time and space I could get proper backgrounds and up the quality of the pics, add a second flash unit and the pics would be better.
Starting to think about the holidays. The thyroid sadly came too late for ideal left alone for 3 weeks but even so it should be enough. The holiday is not going to be during Transpride Brighton, which I am curiously unworried about as last year it was well, underwealming, not sure what I expected but possibly the picnic on the beach would have been fun if  it had not been terrential rain. The return visit to the Transister venue was interesting but while it did emphasise how far I had travelled it also showed how far yet to go too.

Pilates result

Shaved my legs today, feel it even now, lovely. The point is for the last 2 weeks I have been doing a lot of pilates leg work mostly and after the deforestation looked in the mirror and saw that it was good. Not a massive difference but ertainly more toned and a better look. We shall have to see whether it continues.  The abdomen looks better too, sadly there is still weight to lose but that may have to wait till the thyroid is resolved. All in allits good news. Soon will  be wearing shorst running so will get a slight tan too which will help. If the neice does goes sunday after next then there might, just might, be the possibility of some new pics. Came within a whisker of liberating the other flash yesterday, might yet happen. Be good to just dress yet alone really go for it.
Put in a bid for some stripper sandals from A~~~~~~ studio which got trashed by the flood. Would have liked the white booties which a rather wonderful gurl wore for some pics which left quite an impression but where probably too small. Where they would be sent to if I were to win then is anybodies quess but even so its an idea.
Moving on there is the question regarding holiday 2016. I keep going back to the bendy bus going back to Falmer, not uncomfortable but even so something awry.  Its cheap and cheerful, there is the walk a lot does still work. Its a tricky one.

Trying Ones Best

OK lets take a load of pics, dressed, say 200plus, out of that number ignoring duplicates, technically unacceptable pics and ones with clothes or wig out of place there are  a worrying few. These pics taken wehn dashing in heels to pose or when counted number of shots wrong can show a not very flattering image which is unmistakably masculine. So side on my ribcage is too large or my chin ios too big or hands too large, well these pics will never make it to Photoshop.
Last summer tried twice to run dressed, the first time was dreadful, wig lets not go there, makeup a mess, sports top didnot contain the breast forms. Thesecond time learnt from these mistakes. Then when on SDW a woman looking for her mobile phone saw me in the distance and said I was a man. The ultimate point is even if I got a voice spot on, smaller hands and lost 8 inchs off my height I would still not pass. Not that ultimately that matters. This line of thought was started by seeing a gurl who I admire and who has done more than most to be feminine in a picture doing a run it was not close up and the big shoulders showed, it was a it depressing  but we do our best. We do not pass but we try our best.

New Pics but old issues

Managed some pics today, not sure how long I would have and that took the shine off it. All in all it was a very stressful event and the pics initially looked OK. Bit of lens flare but OK. Sadly after converting them to .DNG and more examination they were a mix of out of focus and over exposed. Will be able to salvage some but yet again creeping disappointment again. The lens flare not sure why that happens  it just seemed to appear several years ago. The focus issue comes and goes. The main problem is I need time to resolve these issues and get the new flash up and running consistantly. The second issue is the closeness and the area of the space where I can take pics. If I know I have time then can put up the parachute material and bounce flash. I could get a proper frame and background for about £30 to £40 and if was alone or had a whole week would try it. Having said all that the pics can be technically quite good sometimes just not enough.
The eyes look old and the mouth creases too, its all so very frustrating. Suppose in a way do feel better but yes well know where that one goes.
The new red Katmandu corset worked well and 26 inch was pretty well spot on, take that grumpy grey haired woman shop assistant. Was it worth £40, well possibly but do need to try the other corset too.

Back Again

Well the pic fest did not happen, again, again. Before I went to Manchester on the saturday hjitKatmandu, been told they were closing down. Scored 2 half price corsets, £40. One is a proper corset and the other wil be fine for pics, ideally would have gone a size up but will do for picsand possibly giving the piercer one. Some bizarre idea of a burlesque act which the pseudo corset will do fine for.  Also got an active wear top and leggings which need trying on properly. To complete this got a £27 MAC foundation brush. Not totally sure why. Also have 2 American Apparel leotards on the way from Ebay, £20. Then again there is a MTP tank boiler suit which may be useful for pics.
There is a sense that not getting the time to dress and when do do not.  Lets blame the thyroid.  If it does get nuked half wondering about a few days away, if can afford it.