Its not s good, its not so bad

Lets start negative then get positive.  Got the pics back frm thr expensive photoshoot.  Oh dear, dear, dear.  Terribly disappointing, look like Mr Punch, all chin and nose.  No sure what has gone wrong.  Anyway best to write that one off, not being published, no new beginning, no nothing.  Say £150 down the swannie. The first makeup session was very amateurish and well meaning but very little in it for me.   Gosh this all sounds bad and a lot if it is but we live and learn.  Not totally happy with the new underbust corset either,muffin top. 
Lets move on. An awful lot did work last week and have to appreciate that.  Worried will forget what did work and under estimate the success of it all.  For an awful lot did work, The Emporium, Morrisons. No holiday where out for 2 full days is a  fail.  Hope this tops up the trans me and I will be happy for some time.  Have image of being in Hand in Heart monday night, just left alone.  Not enough really do need to interact.
As ever the ratchet has moved forward. Summer 2014, well money issues for one thing.  University of Brighton I suppose.  Better shaving soap will help.  Going to have to do some big thinking.

Its all the same.  This pic could be from 2012.  OK it works but even so need evolution and progress.  A trench coat would help.

Just back, how was it?

Well back in the big chair.  Just first pass at the Brighton experience.  Lets pass on the photosessions for the moment.  Out monday evening, tuesday and thursday.  No problems at all.  Had a good time.  The time at The Emporium immediately stands out.  Quite a few bum wiggle moments all round which is good. Had drink at Kings and Queens, nice.  The Signalman was OK, the Taylor Street coffee was good, chatting about aeropress.  The Axford corset, the business at Morrisons queue, the gin and tonic at the Prince Albert.  Will go into all these later.  So what went wrong, what could be improved and what worked?  Well, glasses for when using contact lenses would help, the feet were wet with the flatties on the last day.  Not convinced by the ankle length tights, or the leggings, the shaving was not good either. The Laura bag was a result, the goretex worked well as ever, the lip stain was a result too,  the bladder was OK too.  Seemed to get there with the makeup, still taking too long to put on.  The wig was fine, perhaps some form of a purse would be good.  Perhaps some type of shock absorbant insole would be good. As ever, the voice is not good. Granted Brighton is a safe environment but even so it went well. 
The big issue is women are seldom seen  by themselves, nothing can do about that.  The photoshoots well the ball is still in play over that one but not too optimistic.  Feel a lot better and going home was a bit of a battle.  Lets see what happens over the next few days and bubbles to the surface.  Would love a short trenchcoat.

Interiim report

Well here we are. Lying in a bed in Premier in Brighton. One full day of dressing and a evening. Todays makeup session was interesting not only because taken out of comfort zone and on to new places by train. Tomorow its the big one but do not think will go dressed. The flat shoes are hard on the knees! Really do need some inner soles. Apart from that geting out and about has already given a few MTM moments.  The goretex is surprisingly warm a bit of doubt about the leggings look, the flats give a Max Wall effect which did not get in the summer. Thursday could be interesting but not sure want to spend so much time on one thing. Not worying about it now. Be good to hit museum, Black Chappati place and  do the run. We shall see.  All lf a sudden 3 days seems to little. Then sgain clocked up a few hours and feel so much better. 30 mins probably up soon so will stop

Nearly ready for the off.

There are several seminal moments in the Brighton canon.  In 2003 I stayed for the first time at University of Brighton.  It was a total success.  The room was high up and you could sit on the window sill getting quietly drunk and wach seagulls over the Pier as it went dark. Sadly never got that room or one similiar ever again.
Then in 2012 I stayed in Legends over the summer.  Dressed and out most days, lets say 9.  Total success. OK probably pushing against an open door.  Actually Legends was a bit of a mess in that the room was too noisy and summer 2013 was less successful from a room point of view.
Tomorrow night I will be in Brighton again. The room will be a Premier Inn so not a lot to worry about there.  Day in Rochester well we will see.  The makeup in Worthing, again we shall see.  Still leaves thursday.  Also the under pass walk or run to be fair.  The Clare Project probably will not go to neither the Tranny Party.  Quite like the idea of Lewes or University of Sussex or Southease church.
Sadly the chance of mixing with other Tgirls is depressingly slim.  It has happened but not confident it will again. Yes a drink, say tuesday evening at Legends but well, there is no guarantee and it could be a 45 minute staring out at the big wheel. Which is not too bad really but have moved on. 
This summer could well end up at University of Brighton again.  Cheap and cheerful, left alone. Hopefully not the laundrette again!
So the Regatta Survivor 100 is nearly packed. The Oyster card is prepped.  Liquid Oxygen is being pumped into the tanks and the window of launch is approaching.  Can only wonder what should pack and not pack to optimise the experience. 

Better to travel hopefully...

On monday I will go to Brighton.  More worried about packing and what to take at the moment but the odd twinge of excitement.  Battle of what to take to photgraphers.  To be honest had half hoped they had clothing, shoes but no.  Not sure what type of pic will actually get but lets move on.  There is a sense this may be the last time go to a such a place.  Its expensive, slight sense the game is not worth the candle and also not sure what will do with the pics.  deleted one XHamster account and the second lies dormantish.  Partly its the experienc, being pampered, posing for someone all good preening.  Also the getting stuff down before it really is too late. 
There are 2 good days in Brighton, fill them easily.  Concerned about the weather but did it all last year. 
There was a post about some girls who transitioned a few years ago saying how they would, on reflection, have been ahppier, if they could ave taken testestrone blockers and been androgenous. That has a certain resonance. A***** also said she knew girls who regretted, but not totally, losing their penis.  Actually losing it would not be an issue.
A***** is moving to Bury Manchester.  Would like a few days in Manchester or even Liverpool or Preston so that may be an option.  Possibly even for the summer holidays. 
Getting back waxed tomorrow. £25.  Sadly this will not be some lovelygirly pampering experience but a do and get out.  Have not got a rapport with the woman who waxes. 
I know the Brighton Premier Inn.  Have 2 images.  One is lying in a bath with a bathbomb, radio on and drinking a G and T.  Also having a bath in the morning.  Pure dedadence!  Second image is lying in bed, in the dark, with the radio on and something covering the display but still showing some light.  Going to have to be careful with regard to my sinuses and the air conditioning. 
Joe Jackson sang "You can't get what you want till you know what you want"  so best to have a plan.  Think its time for the Royal Pavilion, the most fantastic palace in Europe, well perhaps. 
Ideally do Rochester dressed, lets see how tuesday goes. 
Its such a shame about Legends.  Thats how it goes. 
The ultimate image is hitting Brighton platform dressed, the flatties touching down on the concrete.  Would need to get dressed between Kings Cross and Brighton.  Actually that might be actually do able but not sure about the hotel reception.  If there were a toilet in the train still take 10 minutes at least.  sweaty and tired not ideal.  Minimal makeup , probably only lipstick and some foundation but possible.  Right train last stop East Croydon give enough time.  Must check the train. 

No meeting of minds

In theory J and K were going to the cinema tonight and I to my support group.  Not a dun deal and was itve meeting contemplating missing it.  Anyway they did not and I didnot.  Started to feel a bit angry that I could not go as did the good run yesterday and going to the gym would have been suspicious I suppose.  Second consectitive meeting missed.  Not ideal.  The meetings are a bit flat now and its the chance to dress which keeps me going there.  Never really sure what expected from the group.  Its been very valuable but for some time its a bit flat.  look around and its badly fitting wigs and old or at least older fatter Tgirls.  Gosh that sounds bad and I do not exclude myself from that defination. May drop to every other meeting or something might happen. Not sure what could happen but we shall see.
Bought a new big hair wig for the pics on wednesday. Bit worried about what to take and what to wear for Brighton. Suppose the answer is just do it and hit Primark if required.  Want to finally do the Royal Pavilion.Two days of it.  As ever, not enough, Could never be.
Wondered what to do with the pics.  Again we shall see what actually get. £140 its a lot ofmoney, probably worth it but could be  a bad mistake.

Hoping for the best

Another sunday inthe chair.  In 8 days Brighton.  Sorting out another photosession well we will see.  The 9 mile run is looking very doable. Possible makeup session in Brighton.  Getting a bit worried about the clothing.  The boots could be too tight and too big for the pack. Probably be the Sarah Lund jumper and jeans, probably flat shoes and goretex.  It works and has been tested.  New bag which will be nice. Not sure about Claire Project, have to see about that.  Possibly Duke of Yorks.  Like to dot he Emporium again, The Signalman, Museum, walk along Kemptown. Its not really enough anymore, do want to Interact.
Booked a makeup session. Probably last 3 hours. Need to take own clothes which is a pain but hopefully doable.  Two hours by train but going to A*****s tok as long I suppose.  Shame about the £35 train ticket.  So the cost will be £135.  Is it worth it? Hoping for a few good pics and a nice time.  Ideally also get published but thats a bit more unlikely.
Its a lot of money but do need something to keep going.  last such trip was Spring last year!