Play the ball as it lies

Was in Tescos and they had as a yellow label "miniblinis."  Like Prousts madeline's, say the Jacobs orange club and Moor House or Middleton House, sent back to the early eighties and the Lanes Brighton.  Well, on a wall on the good Lanes there was a sign "Russian Blinis"  no doubt to a restaurant doing said consumtables. Possibly even strong vodka.   Like Browns and the antique shop  Brighton was full of places I thought I hadno right to go.  I have a memory in 1985 looking in a mirrow and saying I have a waist and being mildly shocked.  In 1985 there were a couple of "experiments" into crossdressing which fizzled out.  Years later remember being in "Tranny Party" now sadly defunct and people talkng about the trans Brighton places, not very many it has to be said but interesting.  Suspect am trying to justify decades of denial.  Denial really?  OK it does not matter.  I am here now and have done quite a few things which puts me in a good position.  Perhaps thats it.  how many times must I cut the Gordian knot?  I am here now and it works. I t did not in the past for what ever reason but it does now.  Move foward for stagnation lies otherwise.